a Chinese Christmas

Ni hao foreigners,
Just finished marking two of my classes and i finally have some free time so I have decided to update everyone on my Christmas adventures in Wuhan.
First of all the Chinese really don't celebrate christmas so the schools were still open but our school was nice enough to give us friday-monday off to celebrate.
And celebrate we did.

Thursday:
I taught my usual classes in the morning and then was told all the teachers were supposed to meet at the main school afterwards for a performance. The big show that is next month had its final showing for all the principals and directors so Super MJ Dance Team all piled onto a bus and headed over there as well. I was very nervous for them as we have not been practicing lately because the school either fails to give me proper equipment or enough space to have a proper practice.
I arrived fashionably late with another teacher and sat down to watch some of the other schools performances.
There were dancers, singers and actors. I was happily treated to a performance of some disney movies. They put up scenes from Lion King, Beauty and the Beast and Shrek and had the kids acting them out or doing voice overs for the movies. It was hilarious.
After a few performances it was Super MJ Dance Team's time to go up and finally show everyone what they can do.
I sat there biting my lip hoping for the best. But turns out I didn't have to worry because they performed it almost flawlessly. It was amazed and apparently so were everyone else. I had people come up to me after saying it was the best performance of the show.
I really never thought i'd pull it off. It was all them.

After the show, we were told that all the teachers were going to be taken out for a christmas dinner. We walked on through rundown, dirty Chinese allies and in the middle of all of this strangely there was this very nice, fancy restaurant where we had a private room waiting. We all piled in and I somehow got placed at the table with all the chinese men. There was Nemo, Mr. Li (the boss of the foreign department) and Mr. Ye (the big boss of all the schools) as well as our driver who is a scary, beast-like man. I thought this would be the lame table as everyone else would all be drinking and talking at the other tables.
I didn't realize how unbelievably wrong that was.
Almost immediately we were brought out 5 boxes of red wine and a large amount of beer. The food came and we picked through the various Chinese dishes which were actually pretty amazing. So far pretty normal little gathering.
But then came the Bai Jiu. Oh yes, the Bai Jiu. This drink will destroy you. I believe i've mentioned it before, It's about 45% alcohol and takes and smells like something I cannot describe. It's one of those alcohol's that leaves a taste in your mouth for days after and makes you cringe at the smell or thought of it.
But these Chinese men weren't messing around.
Mr. Ye began to poor full glasses of this stuff and giving it to the other chinese men. As well as me and Shane, the only other men at the tables. It seemed custom that the females were not allowed to drink it but I didn't ask why. Nemo looked at me terrified and begged me to take some more of his full glass. You can tell he was only drinking because he had to do what his bosses told him and it would be disrespectful not to. I felt the same way. This is when things started to go downhill.
Flash forward about an hour.
Everyone had congregated at our table now and were taking drinks with all the bosses, who were loaded out of there minds. They brought out another few bottles of Bai Jiu, a bottle of Jin Jiu, another box of wine and a whole crate of $60 cigarettes. It was utterly insane. Everyone was yelling and hugging. Mr. Ye stood up on a chair and yelled "MR.................... YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAA!!!" and cheersed all the foreign teachers. The next time I looked back at him he was on the floor passed out. One of the other chinese teachers who I don't think had ever even drank before was stumbling around with two cigarettes in his mouth, smiling and speaking nonsense. Nemo was pounding shots and laughing maniacally.
Well this got out of hand quickly, I thought. We all left after that. At least I think we did. Because like I said, I partook in the Bai Jiu fest as well. Last I remember we were sitting on a couch outside the corner store we usually go to singing at the top of our lungs. I somehow also got my hands on a guitar in all this.
I woke up the next morning with a bump on my head and the worst hangover I've ever had in my life. Who would have thought that beer, red wine, Bai Jiu, Jin Jiu and Chinese food all mixed together well.

Friday (Christmas Eve)
Consider it erased from my life. I lied in bed for like 10 hours then finally got up and went to Mcdonalds. I had a fantastic, heart-warming Christmas Eve feast of a chicken sandwich and fries, which I ate alone in my room. Merry Christmas to me.

Saturday:
All the teachers woke up relatively early and decided we were going to cook a huge breakfast. Some of the other teachers had went out the night before and bought a GIANT brick of cheese, bacon and sausages. We just needed potatoes and eggs so we went out to the supermarket as well as a christmas morning hunt for Baileys.
The baileys was unsuccessful, but at the supermarket one of the butchers seemed to have a "dog special" on at the time. Just in time for the holidays, how lovely. Sitting there on the counter in front of me was a decapitated dogs head, freshly cut, eyes staring at you. This was definitely one of the more disturbing things i've seen first thing christmas morning in my life. Way to go China.
I shook that off quickly as we all sat down for an amazing breakfast. Me and Bobby, being the manly chefs we are, took control of the kitchen downstairs and cooked for a good hour. They gave us the keys to the eating room and we all sat around the big table, cracked some beers at 11am, cheersed to our new family and gave thanks for the wonderful meal we had. Appreciating it once again so much more. I will never take a good breakfast for granted again.
After that we all played a big game of basketball and I came back earlier to get ready for my second big meal of the day. All the teachers at the Xudong school were having a big late lunch at a place called the Toucan. I rushed over there and enjoyed a massive turkey dinner, barely able to get it all in after the breakfast I had.
The Toucan is the only Irish pub in Wuhan. They had real Guiness on tap and a nice stage set up in the corner, where a guy was trying to get set up to play but seemed to be having trouble. He asked people in the audience if anyone could play guitar to do a soundcheck for him. My friends shoved me up there and I played a bit, then he asked if i could also sing a bit to check the mics. I play like 20 seconds of a Neil Young song and the next thing I know the owner comes over and tells me to keep playing. He wanted me to take half the guys set. I refused but everyone seemed to force me into it. Somehow, I ended up doing a whole set and the owner asked me to play there again next month.
Just when I thought the fun was ending we all went out to a roller skating bar. Flashback to the 70's. I didn't think these things still existed. I had a great time though, I picked it up quickly and was bombing around the place, knocking over many chinese people. I even showed someone what a proper body check was.
Later we went on to Wuhan prison where I got into the Absinthe again and after that I went to Vox where I danced for a good hour.
What a day. I went to bed exhausted and satisfied.

Sunday:
Essentially another write-off day

Monday:
We woke up and decided to have another massive breakfast and enjoyed our last day off

So it's Tuesday now and i'm back to teaching. All my students told me they missed me today and cheered as I walked into the classroom. As hard as it was to spend my first christmas away from my family and friends all the people here as well as my students really made all the difference in the world. I now have New Years to look forward to and then 3 weeks in which I am going to begin preparing to go to Thailand.
I already picked up a few words of Thai. Which turns out is even more rediculous than Chinese
Sawaatdiikhrap!
Corey